You know me – I LOVE all things social media.
I also love chatting about dating and relationships because…well I’m a girl, and that’s what we do.
So you can understand my disappointment when I realized that two of my favorite things didn’t exactly mesh well together. They CAN, but they often don’t.
Instead of straight up dissing the glorious channel of virtual communication that is social media, though, I’d like to give you all a few thoughts on why social media could potentially be harmful to our dating lives.
1. the curse of the alternative.
With Instagram, Facebook, Tinder, and all of these other social apps, there are literally thousands of members of the opposite sex at our fingertips that we would have never known existed. And hey – that could be a great thing. BUT, I’m noticing that this influx of new people that we’re being introduced to on a constant basis is causing confusion and non-committal attitudes toward dating. I think it’s so important to be self aware and know what we actually want.
2. stalking made easy.
Ohh yes, the joys of Internet stalking. It’s great to do your research on the person you are about to meet but sometimes it’s nice to leave things to be a mystery, After all what are you going to talk about on your first date if you already know everything about them through their social media channels. It must’ve been quite nice, though, in the days where you literally would have no idea where people were, who they were with, or what they were doing/listening to/wearing 24/7.
3. we’re always looking down.
This is more of an overall cell phone issue, but social media definitely plays a huge part. We’ve been programed to use any pass time, travel time, or basically any time we’re not actively engaged in something else to be staring down at our phones. There’s no denying that this is taking away from human interaction (and not just when it comes to dating). Some of the places where we are glued to our phones are actually the places you could meet the most amazing person. So whether you are on the bus, at the grocery store, or waiting for friends at the bar – just look UP!
4. we’re getting lazy.
This is probably what I find to be most unfortunate, just because I’m your typical girl who has been overexposed to more romantic comedies than I care to admit. But I feel like meet cutes in “real life” don’t happen quite like they used to.
I think the reason is: 1) it’s straight up easier and more convenient to communicate via an app/social media and 2) with the decline of face to face interaction comes a rise in fearing rejection. It’s almost like we’re no longer cut out for being turned down in person because instead we’re being “swiped left” or scrolled past without ever even knowing it.
With all of that being said, let me revert to my hopeful romantic self and say that I do trust that love is a stronger force than any selfie, status, or app.
Like I said before, the takeaway from all of this isn’t that social media is the arch enemy of dating, but more so to be aware and use it wisely. So the next time you’re liking his photo or sending her a wink, just remember that there’s an actual person on the other end of the screen.